Having Fun With Obsolete Words

Posted 12-26-18

The English language has a boatload of obsolete words we rarely or never use, and I find it interesting to get reacquainted with them every now and then. Writers, take note of these gems and look for ways to put them back in circulation. I have added “helpful” explanatory notes for each!

Farctate – completely satiated or full to the point of bursting. (Usually followed by flatulate. I’m sure the words are related somehow.)

Philodox – a dogmatic person who is especially fond of his/her own opinions. (This term is especially useful when describing elected politicians.)

Gramercy – an exclamation of pleased surprise. (See also “Lordhavemercy” for unpleasant surprises.)

Cavil – to raise trivial and oftentimes irritating objections or to find fault unnecessarily. (Marriage counselors use this one a lot.)

Churlish – a rude, boorish, or miserly person. (Normally, we simply say “stop being an ass”, but that requires four words.)

Frisson – a sudden, passing shudder of emotion or excitement. (I believe romance writers could get some mileage out of this one!)

Gargalesthesia – a term given to the sensation caused by being tickled. (Hmmm…I was sure this meant a fear of gargling.)

Beldam – a term for “grandmother”. (Related to Ohdam which means “mother-in-law” and Hotdam which refers to one’s wife.)

Defalcation – the act of misusing funds or embezzling. (Similar to defecation or “Oh Shit”, the expression used when one is caught defalcating.)

Vulpine – crafty and cunning. (This is less confusing than saying “foxy”, which may be confused with “Hotdam” above.)

Buccula – the fold of fatty tissue under the jaw, commonly called a “double chin”. (Related to Buttula, Guttula, or any other sagging body part.)

Brontide – a rumbling sound like distant thunder. (Do not confuse with “farctate”, above.)

Morosoph – a learned fool, or one who puts up the pretense of knowledge or wisdom. (Most of us either live next to, or work with a Morosoph. See also gasbag, jackass, moron.)

Hypermnesia – having an exceptional memory. (A little less clumsy than “memory like an elephant” and the opposite of amnesia or “can’t remember a damn thing”.)

Factotum – a person having many diverse traits and different responsibilities or serving in a wide range of capacities. (Replaced in modern English with “Mom”.)

Virago – a large, strong, or domineering woman. (See note on “Ohdam” above.)

Lalochezia – the emotional relief gained by emitting vulgar or indecent words. (Huh! And all this time I just thought it was someone who lacked self control, manners, or a proper upbringing.)

And there you have it! English is fascinating, and it’s too bad we restrict our word usage to the tried and true. So, good luck preventing your churlish beldam from farctating in public. Gramercy!! 

(click HERE for the source article)